Friday, May 26, 2006
The Perfect Prayer
So this led to an adventure in prayer. I must have brought around four books on prayer and realized that only a perfect prayer gets answered. So what makes a prayer a perfect one?
The past year has been an adventure in prayer. I have prayed using 'big' English words. I have prayed using words from my own dialect. I have tried novena prayers, daily prayer devotions, etc. I have had people pray for me, with me and over me. I have prayed kneeling, standing, lying, while jogging, while eating, while commuting, while working, etc. Although some prayers were answered, I never had the feeling that I have found the 'perfect prayer'.
So I began exploring prayer deeper. I look at the prayers uttered, posted, sang, by others. I looked at how they approached prayer. It left me more confused when I realized that my own prayers were not much different than theirs. There must be something going on that cannot be observed by sight, something supernatural must be happening.
And so I began to look deep into myself. I looked at my life closely if there is anything that is hindering my prayers. I looked at my motives, my desires, my longings. I looked at what I was actually praying for. This stage took the longest time. God revealed things in my life that I was reluctant to let go of.
One day, I felt I was at the end of my rope, and only God's intervention can rescue me. I gave up and let Him in. Like a vine dresser, He picked me up from the dirt and washed me clean. (Later, when I look back, I call that stage in my life 'White as snow.') Then He cut off anything in my life that is taking life from my heart. Then He started cutting away those attachments I had to my personal idols. He started cutting off those things in order to make me more like Him. It was a very painful process. I grieved for every part that was cut off, believing that those things were part of me. when if fact, those were not.
I was so naive to believe that after the pruning, all my prayers will be answered. No, not yet anyway. There was one thing left to be done.
One day I began looking towards Him and began to see myself through His eyes. It was a profound experience. I felt so much love that I thought my heart would burst. The deep thirst in my heart was finally quenched. My heart has finally found rest.
And what about the perfect prayer? Keep your eyes focused on Abba and He will teach you how to pray.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment